Justin Bieber: Amazing Chill-Out Music When Slowed Down 800%
If you’re like me (ie, past puberty) then you’ve probably never heard a single note by this Justin Bieber kid all the, er, kids seem to be going wild about these days.
In fact you probably thought he was yet-another manufactured teen pop sensation with floppy hair and (probably) a secret addiction to pain-killers and hard liquor that will all come out when he retires at 25 and writes his memoirs.
Huzzah! Cos if you thought that then you would be wrong!
I had no idea that that Master Bieber must be one of the most amazing composers of chill-out music in recent times. As the following epic 35-min track will no doubt demonstrate, Justin’s next album really should be titled “Smoke a Bowl with Bieber”:
So, what exactly is it that you are listening to here? I initially fathomed this to be an unexpected turn of musical genius, with Bieber refusing to perform his amazing chill-out tracks at their original intended tempo. The more familiar poppy sounds of the Canadian Wunderkid, I presumed, stemmed from a panache for performing and recording his chill-out tracks a mind blowing eight times faster.
Sadly, what’s actually going on here is that Bieber’s ear-bleeding original “U-Smile” (see video below) has been slowed down to an eigth of the speed to create the amazing embedded track above.
(Also, mad props to the awesome crew over at SoundCloud who are responsible for the wicket-smart social-track visualization widget you just used. They’re popping cool shit right now in the indie-music space so check them out!)
Reports that the same track, when played backwards, contains evidence that the moon landings were faked and an amazing recipe for hash brownies could not be confirmed at time of publication.
(via Denton’s rag thanks to @linecook)
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