…But no one told the Twitterverse. If you check out the hashtag #keenenivorywayans, you immediately discover an avalanche of Tweets expressing either grief at his death or outrage at the hoaxed report of his death.
Apparently it all started with a fake CNN Breaking News report in which the 52-year-old Wayans was reported to have died in his “Los Angels” home. An explosion of unverified re-Tweets resulted, showing that the average Tweeter out there does not fact-check their Tweets. And why should you fact-check your Tweets? It’s not like some maniac would manufacture a hoax about Keenan’s death…would they? You could end up in Gitmo!
Now the speculation starts — and let me tell you, it’s almost as exciting as watching Stephen Fry Twargue with people about whether or not women enjoy sex. Check it:
@matt_dahl13 Jersey Shore is 7 minutes away and Keenan Ivory Wayans is trending in NYC?!
@matt_dahl13 Jersey Shore is 7 minutes away and Keenan Ivory Wayans is trending in NYC?!
@Im4rmMiamiYo damn yall killed Keenan Ivory Wayans lmao #RIP
@DrPhilOfTheHood: lmao another celeb successfully killed on twitter …RIP keenan ivory wayans
@KodakBoi So ya’ll just gonna kill off Keenan Ivory Wayans?… Who gets joy outta that? smh! I’m over Twitter for the rest of the night.
@DoctorHyunhKeenan Ivory Wayans died of spleen faiure. Reported on http://www.sellyourspleen.com
@crutnacker I’m glad that Keenan Ivory Wayans is alive to complete the final two Scary Movie films. #twitterphoenix
@TitoGRAHMZ PEOPLE KEENAN IVORY WAYANS AINT DIEING NO TIME SOON THAT MUHFUKA SUPER RICH..HE GOT SO MUCH MONEY HE BOUGHT HIMSELF ANOTHER LIFE.POW POW POW
…and those are just a few choice Nothing Morsels at the Nothing Banquet, which has still got Sterno going at press time.
Mr. Wayans, meanwhile, is surely relaxing in his “Los Angels” home with Brittany Daniel, whom I heard he was dating, last time I gave a shit. And plotting his bloody, brutal revenge on all of us. Vengeance is mine; I shall repay.
Pow pow pow indeed, Tito.