The SlashBuster

Image: from their “boat disposal” page. Think they have any fun with these?
I’m pretty sure — no, I’m *absolutely positive* that all my problems in the whole world, ever, can be solved with the use of one simple, terror-inducing tool: The SlashBuster. I have never seen anything so beautiful, so magnificent, or so arousing in my whole life. I have decided to make it my life’s ambition to own not one, but several, and have them painted in Hello Kitty color schemes, possibly bedecked with Swarovski crystals. That’s where all the money from those blowjob books is going to after all — when I hit the big time, that is. Then there will be beer and parties, and we will see how long it takes to grind up a few DPT vehicles.
Oh wait — there’s a video of how long it takes to grind an entire fucking tree (!), and scroll down the page to watch the “automobile shredding“. Now *that’s* porn. (via Toolmonger)

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